5 H's: Highlights

There are so many things in my life that I would consider highlights - it's hard to narrow it down to a few paragraphs.  I almost wrote of coming to know Jesus Christ, but you can hardly categorize that as a highlight.  He is everything.  And everything good in my life is given at His hand.  I could tell you about the birth of my nieces and nephew.  Every time I am with them I find it hard to imagine loving any children more.  There have been many proud moments in my life - awards, graduations, accomplishments... There have been landmark times and turning points in my relationship with Christ. However, there is one highlight in particular I think it is necessary to share in light of the "saga" of the last three H's.  The story seems unfinished.  I want to tell of the time that I danced with my dad at my sister's wedding. 

I consider that moment something of a miracle.  Not because the event itself was anything out of the ordinary - people dance all the time... but because of what God did in both of our hearts over a long period of time to get us there. 

The summer after my freshman year in college, I went to a huge outdoor concert for the 4th of July.  As we were making our attempt to leave the parking lot, we had plenty of time to kill.  The guy driving starts telling the girl in the front seat about this song and he plays it for her.  It was a song written by the artist to his grandfather, who was an alcoholic.  I've only heard the song once, but I still remember every word to the chorus:

I would say I wish I could have known you
And I would say I wish you would have stayed
But most of all I would say I forgive you

As I sat in the backseat of that car, I knew that God would have me say those same words to my dad.  How could I, when I had been forgiven so much, withold that from my own father? I began to weep.  Obedience would be a painful.  That night, I wrote my dad a letter at least 10 pages long and told him everything from how I had been hurt to those 3 miraculous words, "I forgive you."  I told him that I didn't want to waste the rest of the years we had on this earth being strangers to one another.  I gave him all my contact information and left it at that.

3 months later, on my 19th birthday, I went to my dorm room and the phone rang.  I literally had to sit down when I heard his voice on the other end of the phone.  It was a short conversation, but it began the work of reconciliation between us.  We began to get to know each other.  We made attempts at phone calls and letters.  When my sister got married several years later, he gave her away.  At the reception, as he took my hand and led me onto the dance floor he said 3 miraculous words, "I'm so sorry." As we danced, as he held me (which he had not done in nearly 15 years), I was in complete awe of the work that God had done in both of our hearts. 

Comments

[Micah]

Awesome.

[Sara]

Okay, so I have been a little behind on reading your blog...but I backed up to May and caught up. (PASS THE KLEENEX, HERE IT COMES)
There is just something great about reading your words...it's like an old familiar sweatshirt...it just feels good. It's so funny to be sisters and be so different, but to read your blogs, there's so many things I feel exactly the same about.
One of the hardest things for me has been coming to the realization that there is no perfect family, no perfect childhood, no perfect marriage. No matter how many books I read, prayers I pray, sermons I listen to, or deep meaningful conversations I have, there is no point of arrival. No point of...Okay people, I've figured it all out. Life is just hard, and it's a daily (hourly) process of figuring out where God wants us to be, and why He puts us through the things He puts us through. And while our parents weren't perfect examples of Godly spouses and parents...he's given us lots of other amazing people to learn from.
I look back at so many good and bad things in my life and realize that God has used those things (even the horribly humiliating ones) in an awesome way for me to grow from, learn from, and mostly to share with someone else in a way that glorified God. The more time goes by, the more God allows me to uderstand what each event was leading to, and what purpose it had. We are all living proof of God's grace. And Satan breeds the insecurity that we are less effective for the upbringing that we came from, or that we somehow have less to offer. But where I may lack graceful words, abundant knowledge of scriptures, or even the maturity to relate to those different from me...God fills in those blanks with an overwhelming, burning desire to share Christ and His good work with the people that I meet. I've been thinking a lot about the people that God put in my life along the way to do the simple things, like encourage me, love me, lift me up, pray for me, cousel me, invite me to church, sharpen me, convict me, include me, or meet my most basic needs. I thank God for those people, and I am thankful for the awareness those times gave me to be that person to someone else when the opportunity comes. If I had all that to take for granted...I'd sit by silently in life instead of making a difference. Without all those special people...where would I be? I never thought I would be where I am today. I never thought I would begin to heal, I thought I would just stay a broken person for the rest of my life. I never thought I would be an effective tool for the Kingdom of Christ, but just like the song...the Voice of Truth tells me a different story...
I am so proud of you, Amy. You are one of the most special people I know, and it's so evident to me what a work God continues to do in your life. So many times in my life I have had the opportunity to look and you and get a glimpse of hope for what God could make of me, if I'd just let him. You have impacted my life in a way you will never fully understand, and I am so lucky to call you sister. I praise God every day that we had each other growing up, and for the way that we love each other unconditionally. Thank you for all the times you held me accountable, lifted me up, and gave me Godly advice. It was big of you not to attend my pity parties. (ha ha)
What a loud message God continues to send throughout our family...telling of the work that we are capable of...and the blessings that pour from our obedience and faithfullness.
I love you!

[Paris Blues]

amy, i was so blessed. And I am standing in awe of His Name - Jehovah Rapha, the Lord our Healer.